Settling In

So the new school year is well underway and Catherine is settling into Primary One very well. I’m delighted, but getting this little lady out to school in the mornings isn’t exactly how I imagined! I know, I know, nothing ever is, but let me take you through it (a vague understanding of CBeebies morning schedule may be useful)…

My Imaginary Morning

I am woken to the sound of birds singing and sun streaming through the window. I effortlessly glide downstairs looking impossibly fabulous (because I’ve had an abundance of time to get ready). I prepare a gourmet breakfast for my family and they wake to the smell of freshly brewed coffee and bacon cooking. The beds make themselves. Catherine dresses herself. My family appear in the kitchen ready for work / school and we enjoy some interesting conversation over our delicious and nutritious breakfast.

Once Mr McC leaves for work (he skips down the driveway obvs), Catherine and I have time for a game or two before leaving for school. We leave the house on time and enjoy our walk to school, chatting (possibly singing a song or two) as we go. The sun is shining, and everything is well. I hand my daughter over to her teacher and she kisses me and bids me goodbye. I return home to a tidy house and can start my work for the day.

It’s a pity really that I don’t live in my head, because the reality is totally different. Here goes…

My Morning Reality

I wake impossibly early to the sound of little footsteps coming across the landing. I lie still. Maybe she’ll think it’s still nighttime and go back to bed. She doesn’t. She decides to climb on my head and pull my eyes open (just in case there’s any danger I may still be asleep after she climbed on my head). I give in and open my eyes. We head downstairs for breakfast to shouts of ‘I’m starving / no I’m not eating that’. Cereal is thrown in the general direction of the kitchen table, but then carried into the living room and eaten in front of Hey Duggee.

Mr McC heads off to work and I return upstairs to run a brush through my hair and put on a bit of make up (so as not to scare any children in the playground). I’m barely at the top of the stairs when I am summoned downstairs again to shouts of ‘Mummy I really need you / can you help me with something important’. I decide to investigate, just on the off chance that she’s managed to master Pythagoras Theorum, she hasn’t, she’s dropped a piece of cereal on the floor, it’s dirty, can I pick it up? For my life!! I head back upstairs and we repeat this little routine a few times before I actually manage to lift the hairbrush.

I hear the opening credits to Biggleton closely followed by the sound of Catherine charging upstairs. She can’t do her biggle wiggle if she’s not dressed (if you know, you know). I’ve been asking her to get dressed for at least half an hour, it’s almost as if she didn’t hear me (funny that). We have a heated discussion about why she had to wear her uniform to school and not her Elsa costume (but why?). By the time Catherine is dressed I am a shell of a woman. Justin’s House has started and we really need to bounce!

The walk to school is a slow and challenging one. Catherine doesn’t want to walk, so decides it’s best that she reminds me of this fact repeatedly. I am losing the plot! When we arrive at school Catherine is looking pretty grumpy (being dragged to school will do that). Her teacher asks what’s wrong and Catherine says ‘my mummy isn’t being kind’. Oh dear! I get a look that says (I hope) ‘don’t worry, I won’t call Social Services!’. I run home before she changes her mind!

The morals of this story? Nothing ever goes to plan when kids are involved, little girls consider walking to school as some sort of punishment and sometimes you’ve just gotta go with the flow, because as long as they get there and enjoy their time at school the rest is a bonus.

Let’s face it, we are all muddling through to one extent or another. No one has it all ‘together’, I certainly don’t, and that’s ok.

The Storybook Mummy xxx

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